A memory that I hold of bias, prejudice, and/or discrimination:
I was discriminated against when I went to purchase a car from a used car dealership and the owner told me that I needed to get my husband so that he could check the car out. I was a single mother that grew up with five brothers, I probably knew more about whether I wanted the car and the condition of the car then the dealer did if he would have given me the opportunity. However he never gave me the opportunity and he lost a sale. I went to another car dealership and bought a car.
The car dealer diminished equity by thinking that you have to be male in order to know anything about cars and to buy a car. He took the power away from me because I was a female.
The dealer would need to change his opinion on females and the roles that they play in order for true change in this situation; however, if I had voiced my opinion and stated the facts he might have allowed me to view the car.
A movie and book that I really enjoy that I think demonstrates power struggles and biases is “Heidi”. It’s about a family that has a disagreement and the boy and his wife die from a tree falling on them. The baby survives however the Granddad blames himself for the death of his son and daughter-in-law and has a hard time coming to terms with his loss. The village people view his behavior as inappropriate and label him especially when the child comes to live with him. The child goes to live with a rich little girl that thinks that she belongs to her. It is a good show that demonstrates some of the “isms” that we have been studying and resolves a lot of these conflicts.
If you have seen the movie or read the book please fill free to give me your opinion.
Lucinda,
ReplyDeleteI think it is so unfortunate that so many believe a woman cannot make her own decisions about what she wants. I am so sorry you had to go through. I would have done the very same thing; I would have not given that dealership my business. That was unnecessary.
Blessings,
Susan
Luci,
ReplyDeleteI have never read that book, but I HAVE dealt with car dealers, mechanics, etc., who are very sexist in their assumptions! Maybe it's because my dad taught me about cars, or just because I have owned my fair share of crappy vehicles, but I know more about them than my husband, in most cases. I am also the most vocal in the dealership when we look at cars, and I have still had the salesman purposely ignore and try to converse with my husband. I love it when my husband says "she knows more than I do so you'd better talk to her about it!" The looks on their faces! Priceless! :)
Interesting story on the car dealer. It sounds very stereotypical of car dealerships, either taking advantage of women or reducing them to a "know nothing" gender. However in my household I am the spokes person, my husband does the research and I do the negotiation. It always seems they start their communication with my husband and end it with me.
ReplyDeleteWow, I would have been so angry if someone acted that way towards me. I feel that with situations when I go to the mechanic shops to have my car worked on as well. Many people think that if you are a female then you do not know what you are talking about when it comes to cars. I am happy that you did not decide to continue with the sale.
ReplyDeleteHi Lucinda, I had a similar thing happen to me when I went with a female friend to a car dealership. The salesman was very vague in answering our questions, almost to the point of being rude! Unfortunately, that was the only Ford dealership on the Island so going someplace else was not an option. She went back the next day with a male friend and suddenly the salesman was very helpful! It is really annoying when men treat women like they are stupid. I enjoy being treated like a lady, having guys open doors for me and carry bags etc, but I get really annoyed when they treat me like I am inferior to them. Delores
ReplyDeleteI have experienced similar situations at car dealerships when my husband was not present. It funny car salesman tend to either ignore women at dealership or try to sell them something overpriced or with mechanical problems. As a result, I feel I need to compensate for my gender when going to dealerships by bringing my husband as an attempt to avoid the entire situation. It’s funny how the dominate culture can force one to conform to what is considered socially appropriate without directly saying it!
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